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Takeshi no Chōsenjō (たけしの挑戦状 lit. "Takeshi's Letter of Challenge") is a video game developed by Taito that was released only for the Famicom (Japanese NES) in December 10, 1986. Takeshi Kitano (most famously known as the creator of the wildly insane game show Takeshi's Castle) was active in the development of the game. It is considered one of the worst video games of all time due to its frustratingly confusing gameplay.

Plot

A despondent salaryman seeks to find a hidden treasure on an island. To do this, he must quit his job, divorce his wife, professionally gamble, beat up strangers and travel the world.

Why it Sucks

  1. It has some of the worst, and also strangest, gameplay mechanics that were ever introduced in a video game.
  2. You can punch the guard next to the password screen and get a Game Over before the game even begins.
  3. Some of the tasks that need to be done in order to complete the game include:
    • Quitting your job.
    • Divorcing.
    • Getting drunk (which is ironic, as Kitano was mostly drunk when he designed the game).
    • Gambling.
    • Avoiding touching buttons for one whole hour.
    • Singing karaoke with the microphone in the second controller. However, some Famicoms had an updated model that removed the microphone, so if the player had this model, it would be impossible to beat the game.
  4. It's a Famicom game with domestic violence.
  5. One minimal mistake in any part of the game and you lose.
  6. You have very few hit points and you rarely ever recover them. You can get up to seven from buying tequila. However, you are attacked by a yakuza man every time you order one, so you just end up wasting money if you aren't very careful.
  7. Yakuza thugs constantly attack you.
  8. No extra lives or checkpoints. If you die or get stuck at any part in the game, you're starting from the beginning every. SINGLE. TIME!!
  9. The gameplay was so bizarre and cryptic, the publisher claimed to have gotten 400 calls each day for questions and 2 different strategy guides were released. Shortly after, the publisher cancelled the number and stopped taking questions, saying the person who was in charge of those died.
  10. The handglider section is incredibly frustrating and difficult. AND YOU ONLY HAVE 1 HIT POINT!
  11. Takeshi Kitano purposefully designed the game to be as bad and frustrating as possible, due to the fact that he hates videogames. The ending, if the player ever gets that far, consists of a message from Takeshi himself berating the player for "taking this crappy game seriously". That's right - Takeshi Kitano is mocking you for finishing the game.

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